To Be Thankful

  Reflecting upon the year I have just come through, I realize though there was a lot of pain and struggle, there was also a great deal of accomplishment. And for that, I am Thankful. It is no small feat to care for your parents, whether it be physically, or mentally, or psychologically. It doesn’t matter how they need you, it matters that they need you. I am humbly thankful today for my own conscious choice to sacrifice everything so as to ensure they be comfortable in their last years and in their home. I am thankful that I was able to honor their wishes, even though it was the most difficult time of my life, thus far. I know my parents, each in their own way, were grateful for their youngest daughter. I recognize it wasn’t always peaceful in the house, and there were many times we all fought against each other. But in the end, it mattered not. In the end, the thing I take from the last 10 years, cherish each and everything moment. Hold the experiences consciously, so as to ensure the memory lasts within you, for there is wisdom in those moments you may not see. There are sweet moments and strong moments and beautiful moments that you cannot appreciate until they’ve passed. And when they do, you can look upon them with Love in your heart, for they make you who you are.

        And who we are is the very essence of our own existence. Identity comes not when we stand aside and do nothing. Identity is defined by our deeds. And our deeds are driven by our thoughts, our morality, or lack thereof. For action without thought is performed without merit. Conversely, action driven by conscious thought is not only meritorious, it is wholly virtuous. It is in the moments of reflection only, that you begin to see the true identity of your SELF. We get so caught up in the day to day hustle and bustle that we rarely stop and count all the moments that makes up who we are. So when those reflections come upon us and we take the time to digest them, the patchwork of our existence takes form, much like Joseph’s Coat of Many Colors. 

In Va’Yeshev, (Gen. 37-41)Joseph is given a coat, by his father Jacob, handed down from Noah, a coat of many colors. An action showing Jacob’s favoritism towards his youngest son, because he sees a pious man, a child with prophetic dreams and a righteousness that will not allow him to dishonor HaShem. I take that coat’s patchwork of materials to represent all those moments that make up a life, a story, if you will. Woven into and out of each other, these pieces, held together with barren thread, take shape into something real, something tangible. Something representative of something else. On their own, they serve no real purpose, but together, they can provide shelter, protection, prestige. It is what the coat represents to which Joseph’s brothers held their envy and anger toward him. And that envy which drove them to treat Joseph with disdain and contempt, is the very emotion that also led them to eventually bow at their youngest brother’s feet and grovel for forgiveness. If they only took that anger and envy as a warning, maybe the story would have turned out very differently. But Simeon, Levi and Reuben could not rise above their own selfishness, and they throw Joseph into a pit, intending on retrieving him later. But Judah sells his youngest brother to the Ishmaelites, while Joseph is in the pit, the brothers dip his special coat in goat’s blood and tell their father that he must’ve been attacked by a wild beast. Jacob, distraught, weeps and mourns his youngest son. 

  Meanwhile, Judah, marries Shua’s daughter, a Canaanite, who bears him 3 sons, Er, Onan and Shelah. He takes for his eldest son, a wife named Tamar, but Er dies early. Judah instructs Onan to take his brother’s wife and raise up a seed in his brother Er’s name. Onan, knowing his seed would not bear his own name, spilled it onto the floor, an act G-d perceived as evil, so HaShem slew Onan. Judah, now having only 1 son, instructed Tamar to remain a widow in her father’s house until Shelah was old enough to take a wife. During this time, Judah’s wife, daughter of Shua, dies. Judah is comforted and goes to Timnah with his friend, Hirah, an Adullamite. Tamar, seeing her farther-in-law, throws off her widow cloths, veils herself and sets to wait for Judah at the entrance to Enaim, on the way to Timnah. She sees that Shelah is grown, but has not been taken to be his wife yet. Judah thought her to be a harlot and asked to lay with her, not knowing her real identity. She asks what he will give her if she does, to which he responds, “I will send a kid from the flock of goats.” She responds, saying, “what pledge do you give until you send it?” “What pledge shall I give thee?” Tamar responds,” your signet and cord and your staff that you hold in your hand.” He agrees, and they lay together as husband and wife. She conceives, gets up from the bed and vanishes. Replacing her widow cloths, she returns to her father’s home. Judah sends the kid from the flock with his Adullamite friend, but Hirah cannot find her. He asks the men, who know not of this woman. Hirah returns with the news to Judah, who says, “let her take it, lest we be put to shame; but she is nowhere to be found?” About 3 months later, it was told to Judah, that his daughter-in-law in fact played the harlot. Judah, angry with her, sent for her to be burnt. But when she arrived, she brought with her the pledges that Judah had given her, the signet, cord and staff, “by the man, whose these are, I am with child.” She said, “discern, I pray tee, whose are these, the signet, cord and staff?” Judah acknowledged them and said, “she is more righteous than I, for I gave her not to my son Shelah.” From then on he knew her again no more. She bore twins, first named Perez, second Zerah.

The Israelites make their way to Egypt, and sell Joseph to Potiphar, Pharaoh’s butcher, who’s wife tries desperately to seduce him, to no avail. And only when he rejects her advances and states he could never do such a thing to dishonor his master, does she cry out and tell her husband that Joseph advanced upon her. Naturally, Potiphar has Joseph arrested, where he ends up in Pharaoh’s dungeon. Down there, he gains the trust of the guards who give him some authority in the prison. It is there that he befriends Pharaoh’s butler and chief baker, who were imprisoned for offending their Royal Master. One night both men have awful dreams which Joseph interprets. In 3 days, the butler will be released and the baker will be hanged. Joseph asks the butler to intercede on his behalf with Pharaoh. His prediction comes true, but the butler forgets about Joseph and he is left to rot in the dungeon.

The repeating pattern of sibling rivalry is told again. This time, however, it hits close to home. My own sibling, my sister, and I have struggled throughout our lives with a healthy, loving relationship. I spent the better part of my childhood wanting to be just like her, while she spent it resenting me tagging along. Like Joseph, I endured the envy and mistreatment from my elder. And like his brothers, my sister wanted to rid me from her life. It does not come easy to me to say that I do not have a relationship with my sister, despite wanting it so. I do hope someday it will be granted to us both, but I cannot allow this regret to consume me, as it did not consume Joseph. Though he endures a great many hardships, he knows his gift of prophetic dreams will eventually save him and he will rise above them all. And he knows his brothers will be with him again, but this time he will have the upper hand. It is this story that gives me strength within my faith. That what I am writing and learning and teaching and creating will eventually be what lifts me to the level I know I am destined to hold. All the sacrifice, the frustration, the challenges, the joys, laughter and memories, they are the swatches that make up my Coat of Many Colors. Held together by the thread that is my journey. Each piece, carefully laid to create a tapestry of emotions, a landscape of experiences, to which I am humbly Thankful.

Be well everyone.

Stand Up

    Stand Out

        Be the Light

            -Miriam the Levite-

Ignorance & Apathy

 The 2 most dangerous words in the English language are Ignorance and Apathy.

        Why, you may ask, or how, more appropriately, are these 2 words dangerous? They’re just words, after all. Ah, but your presumptions would be wrong. These 2 words are paramount to the movement to destroy our society, our country, our FREEDOMS! For those in power, who seek more power, and ultimate World Power, NEED an entire population of ignorant and apathetic people, the “plebs” if you will. The masses who don’t know and don’t want to know the truth of their corruption and deceit. As Michael Malice states, “most people don’t want to be free, they want to be safe.” I argue, as Ben Franklin did, “those who are willing to sacrifice essential liberty for a little temporary safety, deserve neither Liberty, nor Safety.”

A well educated society is an essential foundation for maintaining the Liberty and moral fabric of that society. And I’m not talking about college education. In my opinion, the more degrees one has typically means they cannot think for themselves. Because their entire intellect was ‘spoon fed’ to them through “institutions of higher learning”. I’ve often said that a BS means you know how to spew BullShit, an MS is just More of the Same, and a PhD is just Piled Higher and Deeper. Don’t get me wrong, I do respect the discipline it takes to spend that much time in an institution. However, it seems to me, the more “highly” educated one is, the more difficult it is for them to relate to anyone outside of their field of expertise. Which, in my view, makes them the most ignorant and apathetic group out there. They don’t even know what they don’t know and don’t care to ever research anything on their own. It’s a Catch 22. 

I spent most of my life being “encouraged” to get a college degree by my father and my ex husband, which I have not done. They argued that I could have a really good job that pays well if I just got that piece of paper that states I know how to jump through hoops. Funny, I ended up in a trade school and at the peak of my career was making almost 30% more than my “college educated” husband. AND, I don’t have the debt that he still carries, almost 20 yrs after he graduated. More importantly, I spent all my leisure time researching and studying the subjects that piqued my interests on my own. I am one who prescribes to learning through curiosity, not force. And if I’m not mistaken, Abe Lincoln never went to college, yet he studied law on his own, took the Bar Exam and passed. I believe John Adams was also self taught. In fact, some of the greatest intellects throughout history have been self taught. 

For far too long, we’ve been convinced to believe you are nothing without a college degree, yet when we look at what these “institutions” are turning out, we realize they are nothing more than cogs in the machine. Regurgitating only what they were told and never questioning whether it was correct or moral. Just because someone stands in front of a class to “teach” doesn’t mean they truly understand what they are teaching. And just because someone doesn’t have those letters behind their name doesn’t mean they are stupid. Some of the most intelligent people I know never went to college. I do have some college background, though I was told that English classes would be a waste of my time because I already possessed a natural talent for writing. Of course, being the rebel I am, I took all the English and writing classes I could, because no one tells me no. And I learned much more of how to edit and refine my writing, a skill that has proven invaluable to me. But to spend all that money and time and energy to get a piece of paper that says I know how to write was foolish to me then and still foolish to me now. 

I do recognize there are some professions that require a degree, however, too many people focus on the paper and not the substance. We have saturated the workforce with people who have some degree or another, yet have no work ethic nor actual value to bring to the table. They are the “Hubris Ones” as I call them. And they look down upon those who work with their hands, all the while never realizing that without all the manual laborers, they would not be afforded the luxuries they possess.

You know who they are. Those who seem to think because they spent tens of thousands of dollars jumping through hoops, they have authority over anyone who did not. They are no different than those who wear masks and got the “jab”, only to get mad and aggressive with someone who doesn’t wear a mask and didn’t get the “jab”. The virtue signaler who screams in your face because you didn’t buy into the narrative they did. The ones who look down upon you because of some perceived hierarchy. Really, what they are saying is quite simple, “I fell for it and you didn’t and that’s just not fair!!!!”

The most difficult part for those of us who live with eyes wide open is to have empathy for them. To see it for what it is, ignorance and apathy, and acknowledge their pain. It is a task we must face. For if we are ever to truly heal, unite and rebuild our broken world, we must first hear their grievances with compassion. When someone is so angry and hateful, ask yourself why. How. What happened in their world to cause such strife? Is there a way I can help relieve some of it through an open dialogue? Are they open to understanding the truth? Can I approach them with Love, and will it be accepted?

When we understand that the battle we face is to combat ignorance and apathy, the war becomes ours to win. It’s a matter of educating the truth, relentlessly standing in that truth, and regurgitating it until you turn blue in the face. It’s time to step up to the podium and let the truth be known. People will follow whomever steps up to the microphone, so step up. Keep bringing truth with the understanding that many will fight against you. Keep speaking, even if you have to scream it. Stay resilient and never, ever let fear consume you. 

Be well my friends, 

Stand Up

    Stand Out

        Be the Light

Miriam the Levite  

Remembering History

                                                                                                                Sun. Nov. 7, 2021 1:26pm

Going back in history to the road paved by generations before, I can’t help but weep at what we’ve become. The state of our world spits in the face of our ancestors. And we can’t point the finger at any one thing or another without recognizing that there are 4 more pointing right back at ourselves.

So let’s continue the history lesson. Take Eastern Europe from the early 1800s to the 1940s. After Imperial Russia acquired territories consisting of the Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealth and the Ottoman Empire, regions with large Jewish populations, the modern oppression against Jews began. (The Russian empire was diametrically opposed to the Jewish People based on differences in religious ideologies.) Jews were restricted from migrating to other parts of Western Europe unless they converted, got a degree, or were a first guild merchant, although they could move to certain approved parts of Eastern Europe and Asia. 

In 1881, following the execution of Gregory V (a Greek Orthodox Patriarch) by the Ottomans, 14 Jews were murdered, in response, by local Greeks. It became known as the Odessa Pogroms and considered to be the first. From 1881-1884, more than 200 anti-Jewish riots spread throughout Russia, most notably in Odessa, Kiev and Warsaw. The assassination of Czar Alexander II (blamed on foreign influenced “agents”, i.e.-the Jews) and a narrative pushed by Russian press, triggered the violence to ramp up. The narrative, being that the assassination was carried out by Jews (one conspirator was of Jewish decent, but the others were atheists), continued to fan the flames of hatred. Economic conditions such as debts owed to Jewish moneylenders as well as the contribution of railroad workers and competing businesses compounded the situation and gave regular people something to rail against. With the industrialization of Russia and the introduction of the railroad, travel across the country became more readily available. Which, in turn, led to this anti-Semitic ideology spreading throughout the Russian Empire, bringing more riots, displacement and murder of Jews. Eventually, these ideas spread into Western Europe and by the turn of the century, Jews were labeled the “enemy”. They were dishonest, diseased, unclean and uncivilized. An entire people were “othered”, all based in dishonest deceitful propaganda. The more it was pushed, the stronger the mainstream belief became, the easier it was for good people to do nothing. It’s how an entire country got behind the eradication of a population for the sake of health and safety concerns. (Sound familiar?)

What have we been experiencing here in the US for the last decade or so? Character assassinations on white people, conservatives, Asians, Jews, and the like. Riots following the death of a black man at the hands of a white man or the police. The rise of the “anti-racist”, Antifa and Black Lives Matter. A strong push to keep us divided along racial, political, cultural and ideological lines. Take what happened in Europe and multiply it the world over, because it’s not just relegated to our neck of the woods, this is worldwide. This division is now focused on fear. Fear of a virus that has a 99.97% survival rate. The divide is no longer concentrated on color or politics or culture. It is focused on “othering” those who don’t live in fear of an illness. It is now a common theme that those “in power” can use to manipulate and control the masses. 

The last time fear controlled the world, the Allies won. But what of this time? Will freedom win? Will good people stand up to fight this tyranny? Will these “hard times” make strong men? Have we learned the lessons of WWII? Do enough people remember? Will we be a free people? The only way we can win is to face down our fears and stand strong in our resolve. To Stand Up, Stand Out and Be the Light. Resist the urge to “other” anyone for any reason. Be at the ready to defend at all times, even when, no especially when it means putting yourself in harm’s way. To challenge ANY ideology designed to divide with one that UNITES. The only way we win is to keep speaking up, keeping standing up and be bigger and louder than the bully pulpit. And not just stand AGAINST this tyranny, but to stand FOR something good. To be willing to fight this with ideas that UNITE, to be willing to offer REAL solutions and  something better. It’s not enough to defend, we MUST build a solid foundation of MORALS and TRUTH. And somehow, we will get through this, hopefully somewhat intact.

Blessed Be Everyone.

Stand Up

   Stand Out

      Be the Light

-Miriam the Levite

This is Just the Beginning

Mon Nov 1, 2021  10:10am

Listening to Mozart. It brings me back to my early teen years when I’d spend hours in my room, writing, drawing, creating, much as I do today, with Mozart playing in the background. Some things just never change. Classical music helps me focus and center my thoughts. If I could only get myself in the habit of typing instead of handwriting (this was handwritten first). Yet I find handwriting allows me a direct flow of thought to pen that I just don’t get from typing. Call me old fashioned, but this is how my writing habit formed and as I said, some things never change. It’s my way of going back to a simpler time I guess. But I digress.

In this world where we are chained to our technology, a simple life is frowned upon, outdated, and foolish. I’m sure many would laugh at me for keeping “hard” copies of what I create, but as society as we know it, collapses, I’ll be the one laughing. It may be antiquated, but I like the tangibility of hard copies and I don’t trust the digital world fully, just too much room for manipulation in my opinion. This way, no one can dispute that this is my original work. It also ensures that my work is protected and if there is a question, I’ve got a hard copy as proof. 

I don’t claim to have the answers, just wisdom. I don’t claim expertise, but mere experience. I don’t know everything, but I’ve learned a lot. I am no more important than the next guy (or gal), but my life has value. I’m not better than any other, but I’m better than I used to be. I do not know why I was ‘chosen”, but I will do my best to live up to the challenge placed before me. To teach G-d’s Laws, I must know them. To live them, I must trust them. To praise them, I must witness their TRUTH.

See, for me, this is not a choice. For if I had to chose, I’d still be married to an amazing man who is strong in himself, doing hair/changing lives, raising my son in the home we built, making good money, going out with friends, taking vacations and living a quiet, happy life. Instead, my marriage dissolved, I became a caregiver to my parents and lost nearly everything, including my awesome career, my home, stability, security, friends, you name it. The last 10 years has destroyed everything I ever knew.  

Now that I’m on the other side with a renewed sense of self and my own strength, I find it imperative to impart this wisdom I have gained. It is time to build my world into something that stands in the face of opposition. It is time to step up to the microphone, replace the charlatans that have been screaming way too loudly, and take control. It is time to SPEAK TRUTH, to Teach the RIGHT WAY to live and help transform this world into something which we can all be proud. 

To begin this process, one must first admit and commit to,

1. There is a G-d

2. G-d’s Word is TRUTH. 

3. To Love G-d with all your heart and Honor G-d’s TRUTH.

I can argue with the best of the atheists until the cows come home on this topic. For I have been in the presence of G-d multiple times and I don’t need to prove it to anyone. I am connected to the Upper Realms (some may call it Heaven, the Spirit Realm, the Universe, etc…) and can describe, at length, many places that exist there. I am in direct contact with Angels, Guides and the like. I have no physical evidence of this, but my experiences are clear and happened mostly while I was wide awake and of a clear mind.

So tell me, if there’s no G-d, and no afterlife, how do you explain past life regressions that have been researched and verified? How do you explain collective thought with no common connection or influence? How do you explain Greatness? Beauty? Love? How do you explain that though tens of thousands of people could have lost their lives on Sept. 11, 2001, less than 3,000 did. For one reason or another, they were not in the place they were supposed to be at that particular time. Divine intervention, maybe? How do you explain STIGMATA? Speaking in tongues? Big Bang Theory or Intelligent Design? All of these things cannot be explained away simply through science. And while you may think science PROVES that G-d does not exist, I, and many others believe science actually PROVES that G-d DOES exist. That science shows an intelligence behind the design of everything in the Universe. In order to drive this point home, there is one more argument to make. What is G-d?

Let me breakdown the misunderstanding of what G-d IS vs what G-d ISN’T. 

1. G-d is LOVE, G-d is not a LOVER.

2. G-d is COMPASSION, G-d is not a CODDLER.

3. G-d is TRUTH, G-d is not a CHARLATAN.

4. G-d is ONE, G-d is not an INDIVIDUAL.

5. G-d is EVERYTHING, G-d is not A THING.

Most importantly, G-d is a VERB, G-d is not a NOUN. G-d is an ACTION, a DOING, a KNOWING. G-d is not A THING, for a physical thing cannot contain the immense wholeness of the ONENESS of G-d. Because a physical thing denotes separateness, of which G-d (as a whole) is incapable. However, sparks of G-d can exist separately while maintaining connection in Oneness through the energy contained within. Because the energy is G-d. And energy without mass is not separate. It mixes all together and spreads itself out as far as it can reach. So in that, every THING that exists IS G-d manifested in a unique separateness from itself. And every THING experiences separately, while influencing every other THING through the connectedness of energy. Each THING connects to every THING around it, creating an endless flow of energy that stretches out beyond limited comprehension. Within that connection, that flow, lies G-d. 

So again, I ask the atheist, how do you explain it? More aptly, can you DISPROVE it? You are free to disagree and I won’t begrudge you that. But I dare challenge you to explain and/or disprove it. I say this not to start a fight, but a conversation. For we will never change our ways if we refuse to listen with an open mind and a compassionate heart. Just know, you will fail to sway me, though my mind is open, for I am strong in my faith with a deep understanding of it’s connection, it’s power and it’s Grace. I have personally witnessed said power AND Grace, which solidifies my understanding of those experiences. 

These lessons that I share come through my lived experiences and the difficulties I have endured. They come from pain and suffering, sorrow and loss, devastation and destruction, but mostly, they come from disillusionment and awakening. I think the most crucial of these lessons is also the most relevant. When something goes wrong, immediately start looking for the lesson. The faster you find it, the easier it is to work through and solve. Whenever you make a mistake, stop and ask yourself, “What am I supposed to learn here?” You may be surprised at how quickly the answer comes to you. Quite frankly, it’s usually not what you expect it to be. And many times the depth of the answer doesn’t come to you until well after you’ve had time to digest it and are calm and rational. If you start looking early and remain conscious through the process, the lesson organically appears, but do not ever expect it to be easy or comfortable. The greatest lessons we learn come from the most difficult and uncomfortable situations we experience. Some lessons will challenge you to your core while others seem so insignificant. Yet each lesson builds upon the one before, bringing an awareness, an awakening, if you will, allowing for growth and understanding. The more we grow, the more we understand. The more we understand, the better we live. The better we live, the more we contribute to society as a whole, which is the ultimate goal, RIGHT?! 

        See, it’s never about the individual, but the collective. But without the individual, the collective cannot exist. It’s a balancing act, a dance, carefully and consciously choreographed, to flow effortlessly and fluidly, all for the sake of gaining knowledge and wisdom so that G-d, in it’s Oneness can understand and experience individuality. I’ve believed for most of my life that the meaning of life is to experience merely for the sake of experience. For, if we are nothing when we die, what’s the point? Or, if we are born sinners, how can we ever reach the Glory of G-d? And why would we want to, when G-d is the One who deemed us sinners in the first place? See, these are the points where Atheism AND Christianity lose me. One says that we are nothing before we’re born and we return to nothing when we die, while the other says we were born of sin and will die in sin, and there is no way out of it. Both of these ideologies are so absolute and impossible that I’ve never been able to rationalize a belief in them. However, I respect their respective places and have continued to seek an understanding of faith and spirituality. 

        When I began my journey into my Judaism, I didn’t think I would find the answers that eluded me most of my life, but find them, I did. Well, to clarify, I found substantiation of what I have felt within all my life. I found an understanding and respect for the traditions and history of a people put to a seemingly impossible task. I found a humbleness in the practice and a longing to honor it, and those who came before me. לדור בדור from generation to generation, we will remember. It is in that connection to the past that we must return. So I must honor that impossible task to the best of my ability. To teach the RIGHT WAY, not because I say so, but because it is G-D’s WAY. It is not religion, it is LAW, NATURAL LAW. G-d’s Law has been under attack for far too long and yet still stands the test of time. When a hypothesis cannot be disproven, it becomes a theory. After a long period of time and it still cannot be disproven, it becomes law. That is the scientific method, yes? So G-d’s Law was a hypothesis for a long time and could not be disproven. Sure, man can still exist without G-d, but is it living or just mere existence? When an entire people live by the laws of G-d, the balanced ebb and flow becomes natural and seemingly effortless. To this day, G-d’s Law has not and cannot be disproven. I think after nearly 5800 years of documented history, G-d’s Law has been proven time and time again. It’s laughable that this is ignored.

        It has been thousands of years, disputing whether G-d exists and trivial fighting over which practice is right. The Truth, if you want to know, is every religion is absolutely right AND absolutely wrong. Because religion is nothing more than a way to practice your understanding of G-d. In that, they are all right. Where they go wrong is in their absoluteness of their superiority. G-d doesn’t care what name you use or how you practice, G-d cares that you call. Just like any parent, G-d is the ultimate Parent. G-d doesn’t smite, G-d teaches, through warning and consequence. G-d embraces and champions your successes and consoles and guides your missteps, even when the consequence is Karma. 

       Keep in mind, I am not proselytizing, as that goes against everything for which I stand. How someone honors G-d is a personal choice. G-d gave man the influence to create each one of them in their proper time and place, for G-d does not make mistakes. So each one is right. It is the Ego of man that convolutes and obscures the Truth of G-d. I use my Judaism merely as a basis for the importance of honoring a practice and a reminder of the task we were given. 

I don’t claim to have the answers, just wisdom. I don’t claim expertise, but mere experience. I don’t know everything, but I’ve learned a lot. I am no more important than the next guy (or gal), but my life has value. I’m not better than any other, but I’m better than I used to be. I do not know why I was ‘chosen”, but I will do my best to live up to the challenge placed before me. To teach G-d’s Laws, I must know them. To live them, I must trust them. To praise them, I must witness their TRUTH. Bish v’li nivra ha olam! Anochi afar v’afar! For my sake, the world was created! I am but dust and ash! I am everything and I am nothing. 

Stand Up

    Stand Out

     Be the Light

-Miriam the Levite